Appreciating Uni

Tonight a friend mentioned to me that we haven't really been having fun at uni and enjoying the time we have there. Reflecting back on the past month (including the Easter break), I can see that he's right.

I've been living day to day, consumed with what the lectures were about, what I have to do for tutorials, when assignments are going to be due, what readings I have to do, am I keeping up with everything?

Then concluding that I am completely and utterly screwed because I sit in lectures and tutorials without much of a clue of what's going on.

It's almost like high school. Although I have to say, I had a better idea of what was going on back there.

I hate to say this but I did regret some thing back in high school. One of them was feeling as if everything was just happening around me. Sometimes I'd get caught up in the moment and that's when I really FEEL, those are the ones that I didn't regret.

But a lot of the time, I feel as if I'm just trying to live day by day. If I happen to have fun, great. I'll feel it in that moment, capture it and store it in my mind forever. However, I've realised that I'm not really having fun. With friends, yes. With uni, not really.

It's a shame because I'm only there for 3 years (since I don't believe I can soldier on for 5+ years like this). So I really should be making the most of my time there.

3 years really do go by quickly when you think of it as; babies of the uni (1st year), feeling as if you're in familiar ground (2nd year) and feeling the 'OMG I'm 3rd year already. I'm gonna graduate and not come back here' (3rd year).

I know this is all kind of contradictory since I say that I have fun and everything but at the same time I'm saying that I'm kinda unfeeling towards everything and just letting it wash over me. Like a rock in a stream.

But hey, this is me. Muddled up thoughts and all.

Acknowledging all this, especially the fact that I haven't been appreciating uni, I'm going to try my very best to make an effort. Uni has always been described as the best time of peoples' lives and I intend to make that the same for me. High school topped primary so I'm hoping uni will top high school.

So even if I whinge and whine about having to do my micro presentation for 3 or 4 weeks, having to stay up to finish tutorial hw, having to get up early to get to uni by 10am, having to read fat-as textbooks about gibberish that I don't understand and try to make sense of it or having to walk around campus 20x a day in tight jeans, I'm going to try to take it all in. To love and appreciate it.

It's not as if everyone in the world has the chance to go to uni, so I should really be grateful.

Plus, I'm extremely lucky to be able to have a great support network, especially people who are willing to lend a hand to help me when I'm having trouble with uni work, even at 3:30am. Thanks Adam!

And I'm also lucky to have friends who I always get to see. You might all annoy the hell out of me at times but I still love you all!